What Does ADHD Look Like for Us

The brain is the most complex organ of the body.  There are a great deal of things we still don't understand about it.  Our brains react differently to a situation as we go through different stages of our life.  That makes it very difficult task, even for medical professionals,  to pinpoint something that is out of sync in the brain.

ADHD is a well known term in the USA.  I believe that is is often over-diagnosed, or misdiagnosed.  Parents even claim their children are ADHD without a formal diagnosis.  This means that when you explain to others that your child has ADHD after he acts out of control in a new situation, they start to treat you differently.  You're looked at as one of those moms who simply can't control her child.  The mother is found to be lacking.

My Bumblebee is ADHD.  He has been formally diagnosed by a neurologist.  Bumblebee is a mixture of the two types of ADD: hyperactive and inattentive.  Here's why I sought the diagnisis, and what it looks like in him.

I looked to the doctor for help when he reached 5yrs old and barely recognize his own name.  I can work on a letter of the alphabet for an entire week in our homeschool and at the end, he still can't identify it, or tell me what sound it makes.  This makes him frustrated to the point of meltdowns.  And, I'll admit, it frustrates me as well.  I spoke to our pediatrician about a possible learning disability, and he referred me to the neurologist.

Dr. Jones is a wonderful and caring doctor.  When I went to her office, I expected to be told that Bumblebee was on the autism spectrum, just like his brother.  This isn't what happened.  She told me that beyond a doubt, Bumblebee has severe ADHD.

We chose not to medicate.  Understanding what you're up against can be half the battle.  This lasted until he started to become violent towards other children.  He wasn't intending to be mean, he simply acts as though there are no consequences.  And then when punishment is issued, he goes into disbelieving shock.

Hyperactive and inattentive  ADD war with each other.  For Bumblebee, this means that it is difficult for him to complete a task that helps get the energy out because he's distracted by something else.  He may be jumping on the trampoline when he sees the sidewalk chalk, and suddenly that looks like much more fun.

Getting dressed also takes a great deal of time.  Just yesterday, it took 30 minutes just to get a pair of pants and he tried to put them on top of his pajama's.   The shirt and shoes took another 20 minutes.

There is no fear of what his actions may do.  He will run into the street and be nearly hit by a car and doesn't understand why you are scared and angry.  Climbing to the top of a 6ft tall bookshelf and jumping off is nothing.

This is simply the tip of the iceberg with his behavior.  I'm am termed a helicopter mom, this means that Bumblebee doesn't lack for correction, or love.  Not all ADHD looks the same; but, the struggle is the real for them all

Where did my stuff go?!

At home, if I can't locate a particular item, I rarely blame one of the kids.  Even the 2yr old is generally ruled out of swiping items.  You see, my husband likes to hold things when he talks.  He knows this about himself, which is good.  He doesn't carry something for himself, so he picks up anything that happens to be in his reach as he's talking, which is bad.

I've learned that if an item goes missing, currently it's my main set of keys, I just go and search his "spaces" for said item.   To ask where things are is an exercise in futility, he doesn't remember picking them up, much less where he left it.  He has adamantly denied moving items which have later been found on his desk.  People have also learned at his work place that he takes things and they simply go to his office for their return.  One day he accumulated 6 staplers on his desk with no idea who they belonged to.  I think he's better than the lost and found desk, of course, he is the reason that the item is lost in the first place.

Currently my keys are lost.  I have turned my house upside down for them.  We are trying to sell a house right now and some of the keys to it are on that ring.  I also can't check my mail box because it's keyed, but hubby can so it's his job now.  This loss could cost us $200 minimum.  The big cost is from the remote control vehicle key.  I have asked what happened to them but he denies ever having them.  I would really like to know how he was able to drive my van to work.....Since that day they have been completely AWOL.  It's been almost a month now and I keep praying that they'll turn up, but I fear they are gone for good.